


a-splash-of-milk Started Following You

by orphan_account



Series: Subscriber Cannot Be Reached [2]
Category: American Actor RPF, British Actor RPF, Real Person Fiction
Genre: Age Difference, Angst, Diplomacy, F/M, Fluff, Gen, Internet Romance, Multi, Romance, Tumblr, Twitter, blog posts, borderline stalking, epistolary fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-08
Updated: 2014-09-23
Packaged: 2018-01-13 12:06:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1225678
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>" You created a tumblr to stalk her"</p><p>"Yes, I created a tumblr to stalk her"</p><p>"sarcasm doesn't fit you"</p><p> </p><p>In which Tom creates a Tumblr to find out the reason why the girl he sorta fell in love with suddenly disappeared.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. June 4 2010

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> " You created a tumblr to stalk her"
> 
> "Yes, I created a tumblr to stalk her"
> 
> "sarcasm doesn't fit you"
> 
> In which Tom creates a Tumblr to find out the reason why the girl he sorta fell in love with suddenly disappeared.

Tom

Luke

 

 

 

" You created a tumblr to stalk her"

"Yes, I created a tumblr to stalk her"

"sarcasm doesn't fit you"

"Luke! I created it to know what happened in those 3 years"

"I thought you moved on"

"I'm a great actor"

"Tom, I don't think that's healthy"

"and just because they and by they I mean; Mark, Ben, Martin and god help us all Moffat, gave you her tumblr blog-"

"I get it, I do, but Luke...closure is what I need and this is the only way I know how..."

"...just don't do anything stupid that would ruin your career...you've come a long way now"

"thank you"

 

 

 

 

 

 

> _**June 4 2010** _
> 
> _The funny thing about life is that we begin to die the moment we are born and I find it poetically beautiful. The fact that everything ends the moment it begins is wonderful. And today is the End for me. Like a story that has run its course, it is time for the curtain to fall, I've finished everything necessary for me to graduate and all that's left is resolving whatever needs to be resolve._
> 
> _Regardless of whoever reads this dubious blog entry...highly doubtful_ _regardless let me tell you a story , it is a series of misfortunate events. It all started  a week before this years valentines day. Working as an intern is fun precisely because I am almost near in my goal my colleagues on the other hand are an entirely different matter. Put under constant scrutiny I have learned to not trust anyone and divulge little information about myself personal or otherwise which leaves me friendless and utterly alone in this foreign country which I have come to love. A few days of increasing misanthropy and apathy my older sister arrives and it is utter hell. My relationship with her has always been a rollercoaster, parts of my childhood field with hero-worship then hatred followed by my adolescence where I enter a truce with her then my teenage life where we are particularly close. When college came it went downhill, her attemtps to control me aggravated me and years of suppressed hatred comes out which lead to our inevitable fall out._
> 
>  
> 
> _Which brought me to accept my early internship here in London, far away from home or what I used to call home, then she arrives here without notice and asks for lodging, awkward and tension filled cohabitation occurs. Then I met this person...on valentine's after getting slightly tipsy, the thing is this person was not someone I knew._
> 
> _Yeah stranger danger now shut up. Now the reason for this being labeled as a misfortunate event would be revealed later on. I am afterall telling a story._
> 
>  
> 
> _It all started due to my idiocy when my finger slipped and I mispunched a number in my mobile. Asking to be picked up by my atleast dependable older sister instead I am answered by a polite english man who informed me of this mistake, embarrassing yes. I took a cab home and scaled my flat because I really really did not want to see my older sister. There are somethings even I cannot handle._
> 
>  
> 
> _Not let me get off tangent for awhile and if you don't want me to do so then sod off._
> 
>  
> 
> _There's a reason why I'm telling this story right now instead of telling what happened to me on the very same day of feb 14. The reason would be because this man, this complete and utter stranger I have met by a finger slip had somehow become a constant in my otherwise dull life._
> 
>  
> 
> _On with the story, this unbelievable man, texts me the following day asking about my wellbeing_
> 
> _'Did you arrive safe' he asks and for that moment I was utterly baffled and amused so I replied_
> 
> _'Hi! Mr. Wrong Number! :) thanks for your concern or curiosity? I did get home safe ;)'_
> 
> _for some unfathomable reason I answered him without my cold and indifferent texts and later on I would have been informed we were flirting with eachother but until then I only found myself becoming friends with this stranger who is slightly altruistic...or just that good, such goodness that irks me, me who hates humanity at the same breathe as having faith for it at the very least._
> 
> _And this continues on for days, we settled to a routine of always texting each other when bored, we were ridiculous keeping count of how long we've been talking and our off tangent conversations that never ceased to amuse me at the same time we were both avoiding certain questions. There are somethings which I would never tell him but in the face of  anonymity I could allow to bare a bit of my soul. Because writing is an art and I am an artist and that is what artists do, we heal ourselves in the expense of exposing our souls and own wounds. And it is here where I would tell the words that were never sent and would never be._

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	2. June 10 2010

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The relevance is that even if this is indeed my writing, there are still somethings I would never tell you despite my earlier claim because that is who I am.
> 
> A cowardly misanthropist

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so I followed through the suggestion made to me and a-splash-of-milk is now an official tumblr blog. That is all.

 

 

 

> **_June 10 2010_ **
> 
> _Human beings are irrational and so am I because the thing is, once I made a decision and followed through I never know what to do next. But that is beside the point and probably the lot of you just want to hear the continuation of my story which is surprising because I know I have followers is this blog and they just increased and I should get back to the story._
> 
> _The thing is our story, in my terms, have already ended and sure it was a crappy ending but shut up before you formulate anything because you still haven't heard the whole story, not our story but my story and this is what happened next._ _We were apparently flirting with each other, how could I have not known that? well if you actually look at my previous posts before this you would realize that I am socially inept and because I have no friends before I met this guy, I didn't realize. The good thing about this is I could rephrase my words to better the story and no one would know the blunders I made, back to it we were not awkward and I just rolled with it so you could say that I found the friend I've always wanted and he reads!!! so yeah._
> 
> _the reason why I'm telling this is because this is what happened next, our development, maybe the fact that he quoted "Just because some cute girl likes the same bizarro crap you do, doesn't make her your soul mate" from 500 days of summer and then it was his reverse psychology way of telling me he still likes me despite our differences was what made me just like him as more than a friend. No it was not love. I was infatuated at him, the why is simple, here was a guy who reads books and movies that are actually good, good in a sense that it teaches as something and gives us a shift in perspective, so naturally like all of my types I fell for this smart and funny man. This man who is on the same wavelength as me._
> 
> _Our conversations are only for us, the ones I've shared does_ _not mean they are valued lest but it is because they are the ones that is easiest for me to share to the public. To sum this conversation which I think was the most fun I've had from the moment we started this weird sort of friendship, is that "our thoughts are stars we cannot fathom into constellations" and that makes perfect sense to the two of us and us alone. So the rest of you lot could forever wonder how but we would never tell you the how. I am only telling this story because I felt the need to and there has always been a dream of mine to tell the world of my life story and maybe publish it at the near end of my life and I have to start somewhere._
> 
> _So this story as you see is my Romance a Clef._
> 
> _well part of it anyways._
> 
> _Back to the story, the flirting only increased and yeah it was a friendly sort of flirting but still it made my day. The thing about being behind the screen is that I could tell him lies, lies and lies and a dash of truth and he would never know. The thing behind anonymity is that no one except the writer could tell you the truth behind everything and even then it would be dubious because some parts of the story are never meant to be revealed. Why you ask? Because whenever I write, I leave a piece of me in my story, in  each words and sentences that form a paragraph that forms the story as a whole, its just like how we read books. We could see whether we've read the book by looking at its pages, a half read book would have  the first half of it with spaces in between, small spaces but noticeable when its close, while the rest of it is utterly close together, nothing in between._
> 
> _That is how I could tell when a book is read or half read or not read at all. Because we leave a part of ourself in there. It's just like Cornelius said about books, they preserved a version of our selves in that book, slightly younger but still us. Strange and Familiar._
> 
> _The relevance is that even if this is indeed my writing, there are still somethings I would never tell you despite my earlier claim because that is who I am._
> 
> _A cowardly misanthropist._
> 
>  
> 
> _Does this story even make sense anymore? I don't know. Maybe this story has its own life and it has started to take over my reign and thus the words I type are no longer my own but that of my story._
> 
>  

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	3. June 22 2010

Tom

_Ana_

 

I'm worried

_"You don't have to be"_

You still haven't called...

_"Obvious, Tom."_

Did I do something?

_"How utterly pretentious of you"_

That was pretentious of me...

_"I lied"_

"I'm sorry...please tell me what's wrong?"

_"I am an idiot"_

_"...I am one hell of an idiot..."_

 

 

 

 

 

> _**June 22 2010** _
> 
> _The next part of this frankly crappy epistolary romance would be the fact that i sent him a selfie...which was admittedly could even be hardly considered as a selfie. It was a picture of my stomach. Which made me wonder how in god's hell did I ever survive until now, because really? a selfie of my stomach clothed with my white sleeping dress and my frankly stubby fingers included?_
> 
> _It was idiotic of me and surely he thought so too._ _How I got to sent him a barely considered selfie has to do with his good morning text which he sent on 11:40 am. Bit late for a good morning text isn't it? but that's just how we roll._
> 
> _Then we went into a discussion of my "brunch" as he called it though I tend to call it as my  breakfast and maybe teased him with mon chéri just because I could and thank god he takes everything I say into stride, he was nice like that, and he was able to understand just from my reply that I order takeout while cooking my breakfast. It was just a KFC bucketmeal, toy included, so then our topic went from food to emoji, since I sent him this emoji;_
> 
> _( >3<)_
> 
> _My fondness and sarcasm could rarely be differentiated from one to the other so he thought he was bothering me, which was far from it. He was always a welcome entertainment to me. Which then brought as back to our conversation about my breakfast which I think almost became sext because of what he replied which was;_
> 
> Does my presence make it
> 
> delicious?
> 
> _Of course the fact that I had no friends until I met him should come in mind, so I bluntly told him that I thought it was about to become a sext, then adding quickly that I am lousy at those kind of things._
> 
> _Then out of the blue he asked me if I was asexual which was a gross assumption. I am not an asexual. Not that I told him, I just changed the subject by voicing one of my curiosities, a skill no one has yet to call out,_
> 
> _Then the next thing I knew I had sent him a picture of what was left of my breakfast, the french toast, I made. which  was then followed by the fact that I sent him the aforementioned questionable selfie._
> 
> _Later than night he sent me a picture of his eyes, apparently he was wearing contacts. I won't make any ode or poems about his aesthetically pleasing eyes,only that they are really beautiful. It was apparently a trade off for that selfie I sent. As far as trade offs go, it was equal. The thing is what happened next made me need to prepare myself mentally._
> 
> _Because unlike the epistolary romances I've read, life is far from it and how much more is my life farther from it?, there can be no grand happy endings for me._
> 
> _So here was what happened next._
> 
> _He asked me out._

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	4. July 15 2010

_Unposted Draft_

 

>  
> 
> **_July 14 2010_ **
> 
> _The thing about dates and human interaction in general is that they are not my area. I do not have the emotional capacity to show my emotions. Too subdued and robotic. And now, now that I have met this Tom who simply allows me to feel, to lose my reservations and allow me to just lower my guard...I am at lost. Never have I ever met someone who was without that pretentiousness and prejudice. But then again who is to say that I am not seeing him in rose tinted lenses?_
> 
> _The truth is that I am a coward. And in being so, I have hurt a lot of people, they are the ones I care about the most, because of my fear of being abandoned...I abandoned them. And now I am utterly alone. I have lost my friends Mark and Ian, Tom probably hates me now and worst of all I have hurt the only man who could ever love this misanthropic me. I am not good with words and fail to express my emotions in the proper way, whatever that is, I am telling this story, this part of my story because I feel the need for everyone to see that I am not the sinless heroine everyone thinks I am, I maybe a victim of circumstance but the fact remains that what I did was utterly cruel._
> 
>  
> 
> _Meeting Xanthine was perhaps the most underrated part of my story._
> 
>  
> 
> _Where as Tom met me in my drunken, half-truthful self,  Xanthine met me in my cutting and misanthropic self. In a world where we are constantly judged, Xanthine was the kindest person I've met. The coffeeshop I frequented with had a new barista whose name didn't matter to me because he was there to make my coffee and I was there to pay for my coffee. The smell of my coffee satisfied me so I left a generous tip somehow that was what made him curious about me as he told me on our fifth date. He told me that he remembers me vividly, as the girl who entered the shop in a rainy day wearing a coat that was very intimidating partnered with a very intimidating look but what captured his attention was how I had greeted him goodmorning before ordering my coffee._
> 
>  
> 
> _Apparently my smile caught him off guard._
> 
>  
> 
> _He told me in a voice that would remain etched in my mind how "breathtakingly beautiful you are", Xanthine for all of his apparent rambunctious manner was very gentle towards me. I like to think it was because he thought of me as precious. But maybe it was because he was so in love with me that he didn't want to break me or hurt me in anyway. In the end he was the one that got hurt._
> 
>  
> 
> _Because despite his gentle kisses and warm hugs somehow there was something in heart he could never reached and I saw, saw it in his eyes whenever he tells me such sweet and true " I love you"s how much it pains him, that he could never reach my cold heart. That he remains outside the gates of my castle. And it makes me feel bad, how I hurt him everytime he sees how he is not enough to make me feel more human... maybe that is just so pretentious of me._
> 
>  
> 
> _It is utterly pretentious of me, to think I am not human or above human follies when I am so deep in one of it._
> 
>  
> 
> _The slight changed in his demeanor made me think that it was best to not trapped him. I knew it in his kisses, how subdued the feelings were behind it, I am not that cruel to trap him in this relationship to make myself feel good. So I told him in the best way possible to leave me, because I cannot fathom breaking this gentle soul's heart, to be his downfall. When I knew that there was someone out there who would and could love him better than I could ever have. I have joked that I escaped with minimal damage but the truth was we both knew it was a lie. Xanthine thought it was because of him but the truth was the fault lies within me._
> 
>  
> 
> _I told him how I'm sorry he fell for such a cruel person like, a monster among men._
> 
> _He told me how wrong I was._
> 
> _I am silenced by his sweet kiss, still so true and filled with love. But this time it had the taste of farewell, so bittersweet that I cried. I am an idiot for not being able to fall for this abosutely brilliant man. The person who wanted nothing but my affections. I wept for the lost of what we could have if only I was not plagued with this illness. Xanthine, my sweet and gentle Xanthine. I am sorry for all the hurt and pain but I am thankful, thankful that you gave this pitiful being love. A love so pure you made me believe in it for the short time we've been together, I cherish this treasured memories._
> 
>  
> 
> _You'd always be in a special part of my heart, wherever that maybe._

* * *

 

 

> **_July 15 2010_ **
> 
> _I am plagued with an illness and I fear that there is no recourse for this. This sickness is called love. One of mankind's greatest folly. I cheated on my boyfriend with Tom in the emotional way. Because somehow that made me powerful. I am intoxicated by power. I am in love at Tom and my boyfriend...well he's better off without me._
> 
> _Tom made me feel where as my ex lover made feel nothing._
> 
> _I am not the perfect heroine now am I?_
> 
>  

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a-splash-of-milk reblogged this and added:    _You're a liar._


	5. September 5 2010

 Tom

 Luke

 

> _**September 5 2010** _
> 
> _And now, surely there are those who are curious about how Tom's date went but that my dear readers are not meant for your eyes, what happened on that night before it all came tumbling down are for me to keep. And so we move on to our story._
> 
> _This is where the end began._
> 
> _The family I've always hated more than I've ever loved wanted me back there, in that hell hole that held no appeal for me. I knew for the fact that I could and would never be able to escape them unless I was halfway across the world. The pain of realizing that I have this hopeless affliction and the knowledge that soon I would have to cease who I am, once I land to that soil, made me feel suffocated._
> 
> _Once more it felt like I was under water._
> 
> _Luckily for me, I had a friend who was willing to listen to my troubles, and I unloaded everything to him. This was before my ex-lover._
> 
> _And now the after._
> 
> _As I sat with my friend and his spouse, despite the smiles I gave them, my heart was heavy. I, for one could not decide whether they were more like a brother or the parents I've always wanted. But I digress, as I sat and dined with them, my thoughts filled with the possible resolution that I would have to stop being a coward. To face the past I've left behind in that country. I wanted to stop this weak and pathetic me, kill and eradicate this side that made me stop from taking greater risks. They were the best kind of people I could have ever met. I was fortunate to meet them._
> 
> _As I told them about my sexuality they were very kind. University really is the best time to go on a journey of self-discovery. Less drama and people were more emotionally mature. Though I was really out of the Uni and the methaphorical closet and my journey to self-discovery is still on going. It just felt good to have someone I consider as family know. I may have lied about feeling down regarding the fresh break up I had with my ex-lover towards them but it was better for them to know little about the life I've left._
> 
> _And so once we were done eating, we all went to their home theater room and had a sleepover there. And so I made lies, fed them lies so as to not make them aware of what I was planning._
> 
> _I had made my resolution._
> 
> _As I spared them the pain from knowing what I was planning. I lay awake listening to the deep and peaceful sleep the two fell into. Once more it felt like sleeping with your parents as a child, when one was innocent enough to not understand that the dark was not the fear inducing but rather what hid in the dark. The knowledge that they'll be there once things go bad. I was tempted to just sleep and wake up and give them one last morning before I leave to disappear. But then I knew in myself if I did that, I'll end up involving them in my world of pain._
> 
> _Silently, so silently while I bid my time, remembering the fun memories I had, the almost love I had, and Tom, sweet, precious Tom who I'll leave behind with London._
> 
> _This is what people do._
> 
> _They leave a note, and this here is my note._
> 
> _I'm sorry._
> 
> _#queue_
> 
> _2,000 notes_

 

_**June 15 2013** _

 

"I, I'm no where close to finding out!"

"Look, You're not the only one who found her old blog, Mark had found out about it long ago even before you did"

"Why didn't they tell me anything?!"

"They weren't any closer to finding out the truth about her disappearance either! There was nothing to tell Tom..."

"..."

"You must have really loved her"

"Yeah, yes I did..."

"...still do"

 

"If the two of you are really meant to be, then surely the universe would conspire to get the two of you together"

"I hope so..."

"God!, stop moping and just check your twitter or something"

 

_@IamAnAmbassadorNow mentioned you on a tweet._


	6. In 140 Characters or Less, Tell Me About You Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _@Cookiecrumbs I'm lost please pick me up._
> 
>  
> 
> **@ImanAmbassadornow you do know I'm no longer in London**
> 
>  
> 
>  _@Cookiecrumbs I know but my internet is too slow_
> 
>  
> 
> **@ImanAmbassadornow go ask someone randomly**
> 
>  
> 
> _@twHiddleston your name sounds british so please help me find my way back_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tom...this Tom seems to be almost like a stalker...stay safe, heroine!

_@ImanAmbassadornow - Ana_

**@Cookiecrumbs**   **\- Caccina**

@twHiddleston - Tom

 

2013

 

Analalala @ImanAmbassadornow 10m

_Good to be back here lol I don't where I am..._

 

Analalala @ImanAmbassadornow 10m

_@Cookiecrumbs I'm lost please pick me up._

 

CaccinaV @Cookiecrumbs 2m

**@ImanAmbassadornow you do know I'm no longer in London**

 

Analalala @ImanAmbassadornow 44s

_@Cookiecrumbs I know but my internet is too slow_

 

CaccinaV @Cookiecrumbs 23s

**@ImanAmbassadornow go ask someone randomly**

 

Analalala @ImanAmbassadornow 10s

_@twHiddleston your name sounds british so please help me find my way back_

 

CaccinaV @Cookiecrumbs 2s

**@ImanAmbassadornow I meant on the street! Oh.My.God.**

 

Analalala @ImanAmbassadornow 

_@Cookiecrumbs oh..._

 

Analalala @ImanAmbassadornow 

_@Cookiecrumbs too late._

* * *

 

 

twHiddleston requests to follow you

 

> _Accept                     Ignore_

 

* * *

 

 

Tom Hiddleston @twHiddleston

@ImanAmbassadornow okay :)

 

 Analalala @ImanAmbassadornow

_@twHiddleston Thanks man, lets just DM each other tho_

 

 

Direct Message

 

_Okay so I'm infront of The Only Running Footsmen and cabs are too much for me_

I'm guessing you want to go back to the Embassy?

_Perceptive, I like that, would you please tell me the fastest way to go back to the Philippine Embassy?_

_Its fine if you don't know where it is, directions to Her Majesty's Theater would also do :)_

Here you go

Head to Bedford Pl  toward Bloomsbury Square/Walk for Life 2014

Turn  right  onto  Bloomsbury Square/Walk for Life 2014

Turn  left  to stay on  Bloomsbury Square/Walk for Life 2014

Turn  right  onto  Bloomsbury Way/A40

Turn  left  onto  Shaftesbury Ave/A401

Slight  left  onto  Shaftesbury Ave/A400/A401

Turn  left  onto  Charing Cross Rd/A400

Turn  right  at  Duncannon St/A4

Slight  right  onto  Pall Mall E

Turn  right  onto  Suffolk St.

_ Thank you, Google Maps Man ;)) _

You're Welcome, Lost Ambassador ;)

* * *

 Analalala @ImanAmbassadornow 30 mins 

_And now, I'm safely back @ work, Cheers @twHiddleston ;)_

 

"I'm not going to let you go this time"

 


End file.
